healingbonds (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
healingbonds) wrote2019-07-10 08:57 pm
healingbonds) wrote2019-07-10 08:57 pm
Entry tags:
Autumn Festival ✽ Hopping Lunar Rabbits of the Moonlight | Love and the Dawn - 2
Love and the Dawn - 1 << | index | >> Love and the Dawn - 3
Tomoya: ...I looked down because I thought there was no chance.
Souma: No chance1? Do not fear, Mashiro, if you believe in your dreams and work hard, you will one day achieve your dreams!
Tomoya: Oh, no, that’s not what I meant... It’s about Mitsuru. You saw how he listed off all his thoughts and everyone praised him lots, right?
I saw that and was kind of stunned....
Souma: Hm. Did you want to be praised too? You felt frustrated?
You were disappointed in yourself because Tenma, who is the same age as you, came up with all these praise-worthy ideas, but you could not say anything....?
I can sort of understand that feeling. There is nobody my age in “Akatsuki”, but during “Trickstar’s” revolution....
They looked blinding to me. I was so frustrated....
Tomoya: Ah, no, I mean, that’s part of it, but.... You probably don’t know this, but every time Mitsuru opens his mouth, I tell him off, acting all self-important.
Saying things like, “use your brain a bit more,” or, “don’t be late,” or “act polite”—I mean, I sound so self-important even though we’re the same age....
I keep nitpicking, so Mitsuru probably thinks I’m annoying, too.
But today, after hearing Mitsuru’s flood of ideas, “Akatsuki’s” senpai and Tsukinaga-senpai....
No, nobody complained. They considered his ideas properly, and supported him.
That kind of shocked me.... I can’t really explain it, but.
I wondered if everything I’d been doing up till now was uncalled for. I kept denying him back there, too, every time he opened his mouth. I treated him like an idiot.
I’m the idiot.... His ideas were actually really good. I only realized after seeing Hasumi-senpai and the others’ reactions—no, I felt like I was taught a lesson.
He wasn’t the idiot; I was the idiot for not being able to understand what he was saying.
There was nothing wrong with him; I was in the wrong, for failing to make use of his ideas.
I was dragging him down.... If he were alone, he could run far and free, to wherever he wanted to go.
Even though we’re the same age, I lectured him, like I was so full of myself... But in reality, I was trapping him in a cage—someone with a hundred times more talent than me.
That thought made me, it made me feel like a total fool, and—.
.....
Souma: Mashiro. Swing the pestle. The mochi rice will go dry.
Tomoya: Ah, uh? Y-yes! I’m sorry, I just started whining...!?
Souma: Why are you apologizing? You can stand proud, Mashiro. For you have not done anything wrong at all.
I am not Tenma, so I cannot speak for him. As you can see, I am a boorish fellow, so I do not understand the subtleties of the heart.
But I do think I somewhat understand your feelings. It is hard to think... to feel that you are dragging down someone you love, someone precious to you.
I was always the luggage of “Akatsuki.” I forcefully insisted I remain, received numerous words of encouragement, and ended up being spoiled....
I act quite confident, blindly following their lead.
But once, I too was just like you—an inexperienced person who could not break out of my shell alone.
Even now, I am not in a position to speak so assuredly. I am spoiled by my senpai’s kindness; they dress me up in beautiful clothes, and pull my hand as I walk along the big stage.
Hasumi-dono and Kiryu-dono must have been striving for an ideal image.
But after I joined—“Akatsuki” was more than a little influenced by my presence, under the pretense of making use of my special abilities.
For example, we lean heavily towards Japanese style. I am not dissatisfied with that; how could I be....
I am simply overwhelmed with emotion by the feelings and image of my senpai—the light of the sun who allow me to shine as brightly as possible.
But. Sometimes, I wonder, what if... What if I never settled down in “Akatsuki,” never let myself be carried on their backs?
They would have risen even higher, and shone with even greater brilliance... The revolution would not have pulled them to the ground; they would have been the sun that shed light upon the whole universe.
Of course, this is but a fantasy. If I said the same thing to Hasumi-dono, he would laugh it off, and then lecture me with a demonic look upon his face.
But you know, Mashiro, sometimes I imagine that sort of thing.
Tomoya: ....
Souma: Your worries, Mashiro. I do the same. The hands of the clock will never go back....
No matter how much you regret the past, no matter how many “what-ifs” you imagine, they are but dreams of foam.
You can make mistakes. You can reflect on them. But do not let yourself drown in them. Nightmares easily engulf men, and drag them to the depths of darkness.
Before that happens, you need to flail and do what you must do; eventually, you will see the light.
The only way to defeat hardship is to avoid repeating your mistakes; to continue growing, to become stronger than you were yesterday.
That is what I believe. No, that is what I have learned, from living just a bit longer than you—that is the lesson I wish to teach to my kohai.
Tomoya: ....
Souma: ...Mashiro? I apologize, I kept talking at you. Did I sound too full of myself? I cannot lecture skillfully the way Hasumi-dono does.
Tomoya: No... Your wording was a bit difficult, so I don’t know if I properly understood, but.
I was really happy you said all that to cheer me up.
I’m normal, and I belong to the crowd of people who aren’t special. That’s why not many people take the time to pay attention to just me....
That’s why I was really grateful.
...Oh. More importantly, we need to hurry up and pound the mochi.
If we don’t finish up soon and head back, everyone will worry! Mitsuru will probably be all hungry and whine nonstop!
I’ve never pounded mochi, and I don’t know how to go about this.... So please teach me, senpai ♪
Souma: Yes. That is what we need to be doing right now.
Love and the Dawn - 1 << | index | >> Love and the Dawn - 3
1. Tomoya says “kanawanai” (敵わない), which means “I'm no match for him;” Souma thinks he means “kanawanai” (叶わない), which means "won't come true"
Tomoya: ...I looked down because I thought there was no chance.
Souma: No chance1? Do not fear, Mashiro, if you believe in your dreams and work hard, you will one day achieve your dreams!
Tomoya: Oh, no, that’s not what I meant... It’s about Mitsuru. You saw how he listed off all his thoughts and everyone praised him lots, right?
I saw that and was kind of stunned....
Souma: Hm. Did you want to be praised too? You felt frustrated?
You were disappointed in yourself because Tenma, who is the same age as you, came up with all these praise-worthy ideas, but you could not say anything....?
I can sort of understand that feeling. There is nobody my age in “Akatsuki”, but during “Trickstar’s” revolution....
They looked blinding to me. I was so frustrated....
Tomoya: Ah, no, I mean, that’s part of it, but.... You probably don’t know this, but every time Mitsuru opens his mouth, I tell him off, acting all self-important.
Saying things like, “use your brain a bit more,” or, “don’t be late,” or “act polite”—I mean, I sound so self-important even though we’re the same age....
I keep nitpicking, so Mitsuru probably thinks I’m annoying, too.
But today, after hearing Mitsuru’s flood of ideas, “Akatsuki’s” senpai and Tsukinaga-senpai....
No, nobody complained. They considered his ideas properly, and supported him.
That kind of shocked me.... I can’t really explain it, but.
I wondered if everything I’d been doing up till now was uncalled for. I kept denying him back there, too, every time he opened his mouth. I treated him like an idiot.
I’m the idiot.... His ideas were actually really good. I only realized after seeing Hasumi-senpai and the others’ reactions—no, I felt like I was taught a lesson.
He wasn’t the idiot; I was the idiot for not being able to understand what he was saying.
There was nothing wrong with him; I was in the wrong, for failing to make use of his ideas.
I was dragging him down.... If he were alone, he could run far and free, to wherever he wanted to go.
Even though we’re the same age, I lectured him, like I was so full of myself... But in reality, I was trapping him in a cage—someone with a hundred times more talent than me.
That thought made me, it made me feel like a total fool, and—.
.....
Souma: Mashiro. Swing the pestle. The mochi rice will go dry.
Tomoya: Ah, uh? Y-yes! I’m sorry, I just started whining...!?
Souma: Why are you apologizing? You can stand proud, Mashiro. For you have not done anything wrong at all.
I am not Tenma, so I cannot speak for him. As you can see, I am a boorish fellow, so I do not understand the subtleties of the heart.
But I do think I somewhat understand your feelings. It is hard to think... to feel that you are dragging down someone you love, someone precious to you.
I was always the luggage of “Akatsuki.” I forcefully insisted I remain, received numerous words of encouragement, and ended up being spoiled....
I act quite confident, blindly following their lead.
But once, I too was just like you—an inexperienced person who could not break out of my shell alone.
Even now, I am not in a position to speak so assuredly. I am spoiled by my senpai’s kindness; they dress me up in beautiful clothes, and pull my hand as I walk along the big stage.
Hasumi-dono and Kiryu-dono must have been striving for an ideal image.
But after I joined—“Akatsuki” was more than a little influenced by my presence, under the pretense of making use of my special abilities.
For example, we lean heavily towards Japanese style. I am not dissatisfied with that; how could I be....
I am simply overwhelmed with emotion by the feelings and image of my senpai—the light of the sun who allow me to shine as brightly as possible.
But. Sometimes, I wonder, what if... What if I never settled down in “Akatsuki,” never let myself be carried on their backs?
They would have risen even higher, and shone with even greater brilliance... The revolution would not have pulled them to the ground; they would have been the sun that shed light upon the whole universe.
Of course, this is but a fantasy. If I said the same thing to Hasumi-dono, he would laugh it off, and then lecture me with a demonic look upon his face.
But you know, Mashiro, sometimes I imagine that sort of thing.
Tomoya: ....
Souma: Your worries, Mashiro. I do the same. The hands of the clock will never go back....
No matter how much you regret the past, no matter how many “what-ifs” you imagine, they are but dreams of foam.
You can make mistakes. You can reflect on them. But do not let yourself drown in them. Nightmares easily engulf men, and drag them to the depths of darkness.
Before that happens, you need to flail and do what you must do; eventually, you will see the light.
The only way to defeat hardship is to avoid repeating your mistakes; to continue growing, to become stronger than you were yesterday.
That is what I believe. No, that is what I have learned, from living just a bit longer than you—that is the lesson I wish to teach to my kohai.
Tomoya: ....
Souma: ...Mashiro? I apologize, I kept talking at you. Did I sound too full of myself? I cannot lecture skillfully the way Hasumi-dono does.
Tomoya: No... Your wording was a bit difficult, so I don’t know if I properly understood, but.
I was really happy you said all that to cheer me up.
I’m normal, and I belong to the crowd of people who aren’t special. That’s why not many people take the time to pay attention to just me....
That’s why I was really grateful.
...Oh. More importantly, we need to hurry up and pound the mochi.
If we don’t finish up soon and head back, everyone will worry! Mitsuru will probably be all hungry and whine nonstop!
I’ve never pounded mochi, and I don’t know how to go about this.... So please teach me, senpai ♪
Souma: Yes. That is what we need to be doing right now.
Love and the Dawn - 1 << | index | >> Love and the Dawn - 3
1. Tomoya says “kanawanai” (敵わない), which means “I'm no match for him;” Souma thinks he means “kanawanai” (叶わない), which means "won't come true"